Lost in the Shuffle of Life? Here’s Why Perimenopause Could Be the Wake-Up Call You Need

Do you ever feel like a stranger in your own life? You’re juggling work, relationships, and personal goals, yet something feels… off. The fire that used to light you up has dimmed, and now you’re left feeling lost, unmotivated, and maybe even a little scared.

If that’s you, you’re not alone. Plenty of women in their late 30s to early 50s feel this way—not because they’re failing, but because their bodies are trying to tell them something. Spoiler alert: it’s likely connected to hormonal shifts caused by perimenopause.

Why You’re Feeling “Off”

Perimenopause is a completely natural phase in life, but oh boy, can it shake things up. Your body starts producing less estrogen and progesterone, which can cause everything from brain fog and mood swings to anxiety and even full-blown existential questioning.

I’ve been there. In my late 30s, I hit the “Who am I? What am I doing with my life?” phase hard. I didn’t know a thing about hormonal decline, so instead of addressing the root of the issue, I ended up chasing answers with therapists and medications. Did that fix it? Nope. It wasn’t until I started learning about my body, nourishing it properly, and making adjustments that things got better.

Was it easy? No. But it was worth it. And let me tell you, as a health coach, my favorite thing is watching women show up for weight loss and leave my program not even caring about the scale anymore—because they’ve found their purpose.

Stress and Hormonal Chaos

Here’s the kicker: perimenopause isn’t just a hormonal shift. It’s an opportunity to start shedding what society has told you to want and start asking yourself what you want. Ignoring this question creates stress, and constant stress cranks up your cortisol. High cortisol wrecks your hormones even more. It’s a vicious cycle.

Physiologically, here’s what’s happening: as your hormones decline, your body freaks out. Inflammation sets in. Organs that used to have one job are suddenly trying to back up your ovaries. It’s stressful—on your body and your emotions.

Hormones also affect your brain, amplifying feelings of anxiety and mood swings. But here’s the deal: a hormone can’t create emotions like “anxiety” on its own. That anxiety stems from memories or experiences, and hormonal fluctuations only exacerbate what’s already there.

So, the big question is: are you going to numb those emotions with medication, or are you ready to face them and finally resolve the baggage holding you back?

A hormone can’t create emotions like “anxiety” on its own. That anxiety stems from memories or experiences, and hormonal fluctuations only exacerbate what’s already there.

The Midlife Reclamation Plan

In your late 30s and 40s, it’s not about “settling down” because you’re getting older. Nope. This is the perfect time to reconnect with your body—physically, mentally, and spiritually. Your body is ready for this next phase. The question is: are you ready to help it out?

Here’s what I recommend:

1. Own the Change: feeling lost isn’t a sign of failure. It’s a sign to reconnect. Perimenopause isn’t forever—it’s just a phase.
   

2. Get Smart About Nutrition: fuel your body with foods that love your hormones: omega-3s, fiber, and phytoestrogens (think flaxseeds, broccoli, and fatty fish). Bonus points if you tailor your diet to your hormonal cycle. (Grab my free Hormone Harmony Guide if you need help!)

   
   

3. Work With Your Body, Not Against It: try hormone-focused nutrition or cycle-based intermittent fasting to help stabilize your energy and mental clarity. Small, intentional changes go a long way.

   
   

4. Reconnect Mind and Body: get out of your head and into your body. Journaling, mindfulness, grounding—these practices soothe your nervous system and help balance those hormones.
   

5. Find Your People: you’re not in this alone. Whether it’s a coach, a friend, or an online group, lean into support. Sharing your journey can make all the difference.

Perimenopause: Reinvention or Reconnection?

Perimenopause isn’t just a chaotic hormonal mess; it’s your body telling you to wake up. It’s an invitation to redefine what you want from life. Tune into your body, ditch the stuff that no longer serves you, and lean into this transformative chapter.

A client of mine, a 46-year-old from Liverpool, UK, came to me looking for gut health help after years of antibiotics. But when I asked her, Do you think you have a lovely life? she paused. One long minute later, she whispered, I don’t know.

During the session, we worked in 2 lists. She had nine things on her “What makes me sad” list and only one—her kids—on her “What makes me happy” list. She hated her job, her marriage, her house (which she only chose to make her parents proud), and her life. The gut problems? Not bacteria. Chronic stress. She wasn’t sick; she was miserable.

But here’s the thing: acknowledging the misery is the first step. Reclaiming your life takes guts, but it’s possible.

My Biggest Lesson at 40

I’m deeply grateful for my parents’ guidance growing up, but today, as a mom, I also know how important it is to live life for yourself. Without self-love, you’ll constantly chase external validation, letting your talents and intelligence take a backseat to someone else’s expectations.

Here’s the truth: reinvention isn’t about becoming someone new. It’s about reconnecting with the person you’ve always been.

So, let’s stop looking outside ourselves for answers. You already have what you need. You’ve just got to listen.

See you next week for the next step in this journey. Let’s grow together.